: Archive

Jan 1st

2 notes

2 tags

Dec 31st

8 notes

1 tag

Rule No. 1: People are naturally stupid.

When all else fails, go back to rule no. 1 and it will all make sense.

Dec 29th

1 note

4 tags

Old people are awesome

Carol: yea you have to be careful or else you’ll end up trashed and knocked out in a bunch of ivy like me 40 yrs ago. Me: You did that?? Carol I did not take you as that kind of girl growing up. Carol: well have you heard of Van Halen? Me: of course! Carol: well in my time, they were just a garage band so we went to a party of theirs off Colorado and…..

Dec 29th

1 note

3 tags

Family Time

Mom: Who delivered the cookies?
Me: ...
Sister: IT WAS A BOY MOM
Me: *facepalm*
Mom: A BOY? WHO
Sister: It was A* Did you know he started talking to her again
Me: OMG Will you shut up?!
Mom: What's wrong with A*? I liked him. A nice Chinese boy and he looked alright
Me: IT WASN'T A*
Mom: Then who was it?
Sister: Yea Mom. he's still totally after her
Me: Omfg it wasn't A*
Mom: Then who was it?
Brother: Omg it was some white guy geez
Mom: a white guy? who?
Sister: His name is S* 
Brother: What kind of guy bakes a bunch of cookies?
Mom: What's he do? Is he cute? What's he going to be? So he's white? He's from high school? 
Brother: God why do you talk to so many guys
Sister: What was wrong with A*? So what's with this new one?
Me: OMFG I HATE ALL BOYS OK? JUST EAT THE DAMN COOKIES BUT ONE HAS ALCOHOL. IM GOING TO SHOWER
 *huff and puff away*
Mom yells: Find a nice Chinese boy!!!